Don't Give Your Power Away

I realize that this won't apply in every situation or everyone's circumstance. I know that every situation is different and in some instances you are taking your power back. This post is about situations other than those! 


A lot of times we let hard feelings get in our way and we make decisions based on those feelings. In the process we lose friendships, churches, and anything else you can insert here. We tend to give our power away to others without even realizing we are doing it. We tend to think that we have the power, but in fact we are handing it over to someone else. 


For example, in friendship we can let grudges or hurt feelings dictate how we are going to treat someone. Even when, or if, we will ever talk to them again. It's in this situation where we seem to think we are holding all of the cards, but in fact we aren't. We think since we are choosing to not talk to them anymore and to hold onto that grudge that we have all the power. It's in that moment you are giving away your power to that person when you let them decide when and how you will act. True friendship is hard enough to find so we should hold onto it with both hands. 


Another area where I have seen this all too often is in some churches. Just today I heard that in a survey about every 5 years or so a 1/3 of the membership will leave a church. Some areas it is as low as 2 years. That is pretty astonishing. It is so easy to get feelings hurt and then leave. Once again, you are giving your power away to whomever hurt you. You are allowing them to decide where you go to church and where you don't. In this mornings devotional at church, which my awesome Dad leads, he spoke of how no one is perfect and how you will never find a perfect church. If you do find a perfect church, do not join it because then it will become imperfect! 


This applies to places you shop and even places you eat. You might tell yourself that Joe Bob works there so I will never shop there! Or, Mary Jane is a waitress at that restaurant so we will never eat there again. Joe Bob and Mary Jane don't know how lucky they are, you just gave them your power! You may think it is extreme, but when you look at it you can see what I mean. Too many times we let the actions of others dictate how we act. 


Think about situations you are in. Who really has the power? Are you giving your power away and may not even know it? 


In Luke 18:27 it says, "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God."  Whatever situation you feel is impossible, with God it isn't. You know what better way to "get back" at your enemy? Pray for them.


Question Of The Week: Are you giving your power away? 

Love Is A Choice, Not A Feeling

Have you ever stopped to really think about that statement? Let's read it again. Love is a choice, not a feeling. Kind of goes against what most people think, doesn't it? When it all comes down to it you make a choice to love.

Everyone is not lovable all of the time. You won't even like someone all of the time. It seems in todays society people who are engaged to be married go into it with the attitude that if it doesn't work out no harm no foul, we can just get a divorce. A divorce always cost less than the wedding. I find that thought process very sad, but unfortunately true. Too bad the engaged don't spend as much time, money and effort on the marriage as they do the wedding.

When you first meet someone and fall in love there are butterflies in your stomach and you live in la la land for awhile. Then you get married and real life sneaks up on you, and you find yourself being caught off guard. The honeymoon will end, no doubt, but your love and commitment to each other doesn't have too. When the going gets tough, the tough doesn't need to get going. I firmly believe that when you enter marriage you should be in it for the long haul. Just as you say in your vows, for better or for worse. Far too often as soon as "the worse" comes so does the end. As Dr. Phil once said, "It may not have been right to marry, but now that you are married, make it right". 

When I think about what makes a marriage last 40, 50 and even 60 years it all comes down to a choice that was made. My Grandparents were married 59 years before my Granddaddy died. Now I don't know this for a fact because we have never discussed it, but I am inclined to think it wasn't always roses. I am sure there were tough times. Times that now days someone would leave. Their strong marriage just proves to me the testament of their love and their commitment to each other and the choice they made to love one another.

I actually think that comfortable feeling that you grow into with each other is a good thing. I also think you should never take each other for granted. We are all human and we all will make mistakes. We don't have to let those mistakes define who we are. We are not those mistakes. If we are blessed enough to have a forgiving spouse who is willing to give out a second chance then we need to hold on to them for dear life. You could say they are God's second chance for us.

I personally believe that once you have made that commitment and choice to love everything else will fall into place. I also believe our attitude towards things make a big difference. Just as we make a choice to love we also choose the attitude that we will embrace. With God at the center of your marriage you can't help but succeed. 

I came across this poem in a book of poems I wrote when I was younger. I was around 16 when I wrote this. Thought it to be very true and wanted to share. 

LOVE IS LIKE A DIAMOND 

Love is like diamond. It has its rough edges and smooth surfaces. 
Sometimes it shines and sometimes it becomes dull. Other times, 
it may not even be the real thing. 

Love is like a diamond because it has great worth and is treasured. 
Unlike the diamond you can't buy love, although many try. 

It may be tested, but if it is true it will come through 
with a sparkle and a shine. 

Love is like a diamond. Handle with care so it will last forever. 

Attitude

You hear a lot about attitudes. Some people need "attitude adjustments" while others have an "attitude problem". There is something to attitude. I tell my son his attitude in the morning will determine the outcome of his day. If he has a bad attitude and complains and says that he's gonna have a bad day then, yep, he will. He has pretty much decided in his mind that it will. One morning I encouraged him to, first, pray and ask God to let him have a good attitude and a good day and then I told him to think positive. Guess what? At the end of the day when I asked him how his day went he said, "it worked!" I had a great day!"  Here is something I found about Attitude. So much truth to it! 

Attitude

The Longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. 

Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, a home. 

The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. 

And so it is with you. We are in charge of our attitudes. 


Charles Swindoll

What attitude will you embrace this week?                                                

                                                                                                         

Top 10 Cooking Tools & Tips

Here is a list of my favorite cooking tools with a few tips thrown in!

1. The mix & chop from Pampered Chef is amazing for breaking up ground meat when browning. It works great and I use it all of the time!

2. Olive oil! I use olive oil for sauteing, for browning chicken and much more. It can be used for a dressing on salads and for marinades.

3. Food Chopper from  Pampered Chef. This is another product I use on a regular basis. It can chop onions, bell peppers and other things. It makes chopping fun and easy. It is a great tool for getting rid of stress too! Just bang on the top while you're chopping and feel the stress leave! 

4. Stoneware, once again from Pampered Chef. I love the stones and use them regularly.They are great for so many things. They cook the food evenly and are very easy to clean.

5. I know I am mentioning Pampered Chef alot, but I love their products. And no, I am not a distributor, lol! Just a loyal fan of their stuff! The measure all cup is fun to use and very easy. It works well to get all of the ingredients out where most of the time the ingredient stays in the measuring cup. The one tool can be used for solids and liquids. 

6. Flexible cutting mats from Pampered Chef are another product I use almost every time I prepare a meal. It comes in a set of three, which is perfect. I can cut meat on one and veggies on another. They are flexible so it makes it super easy to fold and pour the meat or veggies in a dish. Easy clean up too! 

7. This probably doesn't belong in the Top 10 because it's not necessarily a cooking tool, but it is something I like and use often. It is the water mix ins you can find at the grocery store. There is Crystal Light, but I always buy the off brand and they taste fine. A lot of variety in flavors and so easy to just mix in a bottled water. 

8.  Baking Soda! Not only is this a cooking ingredient it is a great deodorizer and cleaning tool! I use baking soda to clean the stove top. It works wonders and cleans up those icky spills very easy! It is non abrasive so it doesn't harm your stove top. I sprinkle some on the floors before vacuuming and it freshens up the place. When I had an indoor cat I used it in the litter box as well. So many uses for just a versatile product. I wrote an article on all the different uses for baking soda. Might have to go find it and post it here sometime.

9. Lemon juice! Once again, not only a cooking ingredient but a cleaner too! I pour a small amount in a bowl of water and place in the microwave for about 1 minute. Let it sit and then you can wipe down the inside of  your microwave so easy. It will be sparkly clean! Smells good too! You can use this for several things. Sinks, toilets, you name it! Sounds weird, but it does work! 

10. So, for #10 it's a 2 For One Tip Special! #1 Tip: Place a slice of bread in your brown sugar to keep it soft. An apple slice works good too. Tip #2: When boiling pasta or potatoes place a wooden spoon over the top of the bowl to keep the water from boiling over. 

Hope you have enjoyed my Top 10 Cooking Tools & Tips! I plan on making a post with just household tips in the future. Seem to have acquired a lot of those! 

The Pickle Jar

The pickle jar as far back as I can remember sat on the floor beside the dresser in my parents' bedroom. When he got ready for bed, Dad would empty his pockets and toss his coins into the jar. As a small boy I was always fascinated at the sounds the coins made as they were dropped into the jar. They landed with a merry jingle when the jar was almost empty. Then the tones gradually muted to a dull thud as the jar was filled. I used to squat on the floor in front of the jar and admire the copper and silver circles that glinted like a pirate's treasure when the sun poured through the bedroom window. When the jar was filled, Dad would sit at the kitchen table and roll the coins before taking them to the bank. Taking the coins to the bank was always a big production. Stacked neatly in a small cardboard box, the coins were placed between Dad and me on the seat of his old truck.

Each and every time, as we drove to the bank, Dad would look at me hopefully. "Those coins are going to keep you out of the textile mill, son. You're going to do better than me. This old mill town's not going to hold you back."

Also, each and every time, as he slid the box of rolled coins across the counter at the bank toward the cashier, he would grin proudly. "These are for my son's college fund. He'll never work at the mill all his life like me."

We would always celebrate each deposit by stopping for an ice cream cone. I always got chocolate. Dad always got vanilla. When the clerk at the ice cream parlor handed Dad his change, he would show me the few coins nestled in his palm. "When we get home, we'll start filling the jar again." He always let me drop the first coins into the empty jar. As they rattled around with a brief, happy jingle, we grinned at each other. "You'll get to college on pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters," he said. "But you'll get there. I'll see to that."

The years passed, and I finished college and took a job in another town. Once, while visiting my parents, I used the phone in their bedroom, and noticed that the pickle jar was gone. It had served its purpose and had been removed.

A lump rose in my throat as I stared at the spot beside the dresser where the jar had always stood. My dad was a man of few words, and never lectured me on the values of determination, perseverance, and faith. The pickle jar had taught me all these virtues far more eloquently than the most flowery of words could have done.

When I married, I told my wife Susan about the significant part the lowly pickle jar had played in my life as a boy. In my mind, it defined, more than anything else, how much my dad had loved me.No matter how rough things got at home, Dad continued to doggedly drop his coins into the jar. Even the summer when Dad got laid off from the mill, and Mama had to serve dried beans several times a week, not a single dime was taken from the jar. To the contrary, as Dad looked across the table at me, pouring catsup over my beans to make them more palatable, he became more determined than ever to make a way out for me. "When you finish college, Son," he told me, his eyes glistening, "You'll never have to eat beans again...unless you want to."

The first Christmas after our daughter Jessica was born, we spent the holiday with my parents. After dinner, Mom and Dad sat next to each other on the sofa, taking turns cuddling their first grandchild. Jessica began to whimper softly, and Susan took her from Dad's arms. "She probably needs to be changed," she said, carrying the baby into my parents' bedroom to diaper her. When Susan came back into the living room, there was a strange mist in her eyes.

She handed Jessica back to Dad before taking my hand and leading me into the room. "Look," she said softly, her eyes directing me to a spot on the floor beside the dresser. To my amazement, there, as if it had never been removed, stood the old pickle jar, the bottom already covered with coins. I walked over to the pickle jar, dug down into my pocket, and pulled out a fistful of coins. With a gamut of emotions choking me, I dropped the coins into the jar. I looked up and saw that Dad, carrying Jessica, had slipped quietly into the room. Our eyes locked, and I knew he was feeling the same emotions I felt. Neither one of us could speak.

This truly touched my heart... I know it has yours as well. Sometimes we are so busy adding up our troubles that we forget to count our blessings.

By A.W. Cobb in "Chicken Soup for the Parent's Soul"